Racked is no longer publishing. Thank you to everyone who read our work over the years. The archives will remain available here; for new stories, head over to Vox.com, where our staff is covering consumer culture for The Goods by Vox. You can also see what we’re up to by signing up here.
As part of Bloomingdale's 'Mad About Fashion' series of workshops and events, had a in-store professional shoeologist yesterday. We found her, sitting at a table of sparkly Stuart Weitzmans as we were wandering through women's shoes department yesterday afternoon. Sherri Wink, a certified astrologist and newfangled shoeologist at Wink Productions, looks us up and down and suggests if we know whats good for us we'd know our Star Shoe Sign.
Sherri sat us at her table and asked us a bunch of questions about birthdays, relationships, aggression, balance, our ability to be passionate, and finally our shoe size.
She then looked us in the eye and almost magically read our mind by suggesting... a nude stiletto. Being the star novices that we are and not realizing that the Minnesota Planetarium Society had found a new planet earlier this year, hence, totally jacking up everything we ever believed about ourselves based on the solar system, and re-adding Ophiuchus, the snake holder to the charts. So based on this revelation, We ask Sherri if our rising sign has changed, has our star shoe sign changed too? Sherri re-analyzes the data and the charts based on the recent findings and she determines that since the actual age of Aquarius was actually the age of Capricorn, then we are now a Scorpio and our Star Shoe Sign is a fun loving and care-free sandal. Which we interpret to be more of a Havaianas "Slim Cool" flip flop than a Sam Edelman "Exie" Studded Thongs at this juncture in our lives. — Jared Hatch
· Bloomingdale's [Official Site]
· Wink Productions [Official Site]