Dillon Jay's Oscar Misses: "The Whole Look Was Very Granny Smurf Goes to Rave"

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• [Photo: Getty Images]
• "Anna Kendrick. Classic case of too much going on. The dress was a mess we could never clean up. The draping mixed with the hand-sewn details and the lines on the bottom, was just bad. It looks like something you might see on a clearance
• "Whoopi Goldberg. Now I love me some Whoopi, but her look was just tragic. The pirate “yo ho ho” shirt worn under the boring ugly dress, mixed with pearls and Wizard of Oz inspired shoes and socks— it was like watching a nightmar
• "Christian Bale. I hated his look. The grooming/hair was a mess and looked really dirty. The suit was so forgettable and boring that no one cares. The proportions were off and the tailoring was a mess, the pants fit horribly. I don’t even
• "Penelope Cruz. I didn’t care for this look because it looked like she fell into the curtains and said 'Not bad, now let’s add the comforter!' There was too much fabric all over the place—it never seemed to end on the red carpet. Her hair
• "Liza Minnelli always gets a pass because she is an icon and amazing. However, this look was anything but iconic. That whole look was very granny Smurf goes to a rave. I didn’t mind the hair, but if she wants to do punk-comfy-cool, she s
• "Kim Novak. First off, I loved her rambling. It didn’t make any sense and I loved every minute of it. Her whole look reminded me of a Dr. Seuss drawing. The silhouette of her jacket was crazy town. The buttons were all asymmetrical, the s
• "Ellen DeGeneres. I’m sorry but Ellen’s looks were just not great. When she came out I thought she was working for a new theme park called Pilgrim World. I know Ellen loves playing with menswear and suiting but there is a way to do it wit
• "Cristin Miliotii. The dress was just okay, nothing spectacular. It looked wrinkly on her, which I have a problem with. Another huge problem was her makeup. It looked like she was auditioning to be The Joker’s daughter."[Photo: Getty Imag
• "Kellan Lutz. I hated everything about his look because it was totally inappropriate for the Oscars. It reminded me of something more for the Grammys. The suit was super ugly, with the blue accent piping and that weird button that stood o
• "Alfre Woodard. The dress was just way too Dynasty meets drag pageant. The chest area popping out was too much for me—it ended up into the vulgar territory because it didn’t fit. The bag was just so boring and awful it needs to

Unfortunately, it can't be all Kate Hudson in Versace. From the woman who looked like she was "auditioning to be The Joker's Daughter" to the dress that looks like it was plucked from a clearance rack—at a mall— here are the Oscar looks that horrified our red-carpet-style expert Dillon Jay.

· All Red Carpet Redux posts [Racked Chicago]